Boonie Hound Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 A friend, who is English but married an Irish lass and lives over there came home last week to visit. As new dads we were talking about life and the ride home from hospital with junior. His story made I laff. Just to paint a picture he is built like a gorilla, was natioanal heavy weight tae kwon do champion and depsite an English accent and his wife is a bouncer, in his spare time, in some of the most dodgiest pubs. So after several days without sleep he and his newly enlarged family can leave the hospital and travel home. As you would expect he took his duty of driving this precious cargo home very seriously. On his trip home he is cut up by another driver, causing him to take evasive action. My friend told me: "He cut me up and then gestured at me." "I gestured my displeasure back" "He indicated that we should pull over to sort it out" "I did the same" "He pulled over" "So did I" "He got out of his car" "So did I" "He looked, stopped shouting, got back into his car and drove off very quickly." "I carried on my journey." Now my friend admits that in no way he should have stopped or got into this but he said he just felt incredibly protective. Anyway, the way he told it made me laff and I thought I would share it in the hope it may dispell some of the grumpiness floating around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debert Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 😬 Thanks for that Boonmeister Made us larf two tooo 😬 Albert Einstein: The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La vache espagnole Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 😬 😬 Hang on a mo, I just read that again: his wife is a bouncerI can't avoid the mental image of a large lady jogging. Suspect I may be off on a tangent... Still, quite a nice tangent. nothing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owelly Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Jugs jogging.....hmmmmmmmmmmmm 😬 😬 😬 its only a game......... http://daftlardycars.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tam Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 That's the sign of a very poor sports bra 😳 Boonie's story made me 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurence Wilson Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Thanks, Boonie Pear shaped Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 "That's the sign of a very poor sports bra" In fact it could stand outside a sports bar Supercheese R250 Caterham pictures here 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 "Supporting" the "Big Issue"? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex Birtwisle Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Talking of Tits... the bird box I made for my mother's garden is now the happy home of two very happy Blue Tits Alex PS Boon's 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisb Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Now we're back on the subject of birds, its not often that you see Great Tits in the garden anymore is it 🤔 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delbert Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Well there is a redundant sports Bra begging for a job, Maybe the Blue Tits could use it in the nesting box and they would be warmer 😬 The Liver is an evil organ and deserves to be punished Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex Birtwisle Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 There are a couple of Great Tit's in my mothers garden at the moment. It took about a month to encourage the birds to feed here but now we have Green Finches, Sparrows, Thrushes, Black birds, Long Tail Tits, Blue Tits, Great Tits, Wood Pigeons, Chafinches, Black caps.... oooh, Nuthatch and Tree Creepsers too.... At least that is what I have seen this mornings as I sit and work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La vache espagnole Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 brown boobies nothing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 had a very funny experience when out on the tiles with my "little" bro. As an introduction - he was at the time 5'10", 22 stone, 52" chest and 22.5" collar. Prop. We were out with the rugby team - he had a "march" on to get to the pub early. All we SAW on rounding a corner was him stopped with a little chap in a hoody standing in front of him. Followed by the words "If you're going to stab me with that, you;d better make sure I don't get up" Followed by meatslab of hand from my bro meeting would be mugger's chin Followed by rugby team arriving and look of ABJECT TERROR on little mugger's face. Police comment - "you don't think you were a little heavy handed do you andy?" "naa." 😬 mugger bundled into van. Andrew was part of the "door safe" scheme in Manchester at the time - one of the pilot schemes for registered door men. Knew the coppers VERY well (and how hard he could chin the bloke whilst still being allowed to claim reasonable force). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boonie Hound Posted April 7, 2005 Author Share Posted April 7, 2005 😬 😬 Alex - how did you lure the birds into the garden - did you set up a neon sign - bird food here....well it works in the Road Runner cartoons. Or is this a ploy for an upgrade - collect enough birds tie them to the car to give it lift and so make it lighter....as you may have guessed physics was never a strong point of mine...or indeed reality. By the way I owe you a text - sorry I didn't reply but felt sorry for you on the M5 at night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Whitley Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Reminds me of one of my Dad's stories about a "navvy" who used to work for him - Big Austin. He nudged the back of a car while driving the firm's van and when he got out to sort it out the car driver started ranting and raving, somewhat surprisingly given that Big Austin was called that for a good reason... Fortunately for the driver Big Austin was a quiet man (when he hadn't had a drink or twelve) and he didn't say a word but just got back in the van, reversed up and then rammed it into the back of the car with some force. He got out and said "Roight. Now you'se got something to f***in' complain about", at which point the driver jumped into his car and drove off, never to be heard from again 😬 R500 driver. Oh all right. I have a Taylormade R500 Driver in my golf bag 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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