La vache espagnole Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Where's a poacher when you need one...? nothing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 17, 2005 Author Share Posted March 17, 2005 aargh - the chariman just cancelled Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boonie Hound Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 I would imagine the elephant impression may have pushed himover the edge 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 17, 2005 Author Share Posted March 17, 2005 CUSTOMERS AARRGGGHHHH "David, why does xxx have 3 records in your system when you told us it automatically deduplicates new registrations" "Customer, because you sent me a spreadsheet to load that had the person in twice - they registered themselves only once" "Can you guarantee us that you won't accept any duaplicate records" "Yes, as long as you can guarantee us that you don't send me any!" "We can't do that. Can you deduplicate the data we send you?" "Yes, a manual dedupe costs xxx per thousand records" "That wasn't in your original quote" "I agree - we didn't quote for manual deduplication of records from you as it wasn't a requirement then - would you like me to proceed? by the way, that is a special reduced rate as a regulr customer." call from MD of customers company. "David, I'm not happy that you're taking such a combative approach to requests from my staff...." aaargh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil.cavanagh Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 😬aarrrggghhh... though I assume you explained the situation to the Customer Director and said that you were making it clear what had to be done as you were trying to manage the expectations of the grunt customer in order to give them the total satisfaction service that you strive for... If you'd just say you'd do it without explaining the implications they would have been disgruntled later as you had to take resources off their main tasks to do the de-duping within the agreed budget..... Or just told him his employee was a feck-wit and he should have been happy that you daned to speak to him at all!! 😬 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 17, 2005 Author Share Posted March 17, 2005 if this was an isolated incident, I wouldn't mind so much but we;ve had a great one from this customer: "Can you please provide information on how you ensure that the right badges go out on the right letters" "When the report says "All bookings" - is that all the bookings?" even down to interfering on when we are booking staff breaks during the day so that they don't fall in busy periods. I feel like telling them to do it their bloody selves - we do 70 of these a year - he does 1.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 But Dave......the customer is always right 😬 😬 😬 Dannyboy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 17, 2005 Author Share Posted March 17, 2005 that's a popular misconception. you can't ever tell a customer that they are wrong, the trick is to convince them to tell YOU that they were wrong. 4rseholes, the lot. i want to work for a race organiser. then at least the perks outweigh dealing with 4rsey racing drivers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 😳 Sssssscottish SsssuperSsssnot! Ssssneakypeek! whooooaaaa! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debert Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Gives Dave a HUG nd slap on the back "Cheer up old man" it's called LIFE 😳 i take 5 days of sh1t for 2 days of blatting 😬 If wurk (sorry for using the "W" word) is so bad, quit (or threaten to)! Don't forget to make it obvious WHY you're upset. Is your salary and "7%" shares worth 100% of the hassle ? I once got a (quite unexpected - but deserved) promotion by dangling the sales director out of the window (seventh floor of an office block in London) - The MD said "i didn't realise you cared so much about the future of the company, but next time please discuss it with me personally before dangling anyone out of the window." Not suggesting you take this course of action, but just relating wot i did! Remember a famous quote (so famous i forgot who said it) "It's best to regret something you did, than to regret something you DIDN'T DO" Albert Einstein: The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La vache espagnole Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Oh dear, oh dear. Here, I reckon you need this more than me. If they give you any more hassle, slap 'em. 😳 nothing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boonie Hound Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Forward rolls out of one thread into this one - completely naked - runs across cureent thread, trips and falls headfirst into the next. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 17, 2005 Author Share Posted March 17, 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debert Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 😳 I didn't realise they made them THAT small Albert Einstein: The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delbert Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Japanesse technology you know 😬 The Liver is an evil organ and deserves to be punished Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted March 17, 2005 Share Posted March 17, 2005 Bit chilly in the Fens today? Sssssscottish SsssuperSsssnot! Ssssneakypeek! whooooaaaa! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 18, 2005 Author Share Posted March 18, 2005 here's today's idiot: "Could you let me no if my badge will be posted. I will be very greatfull if you could tell me." I think I should BAN people like this from coming to events we work on due to EXTREME illiteracy on their part. Numpty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 18, 2005 Share Posted March 18, 2005 Dave - is that a Secondary or University Teachers Conference you've got on next G for Geoff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 18, 2005 Author Share Posted March 18, 2005 nails, beauty and tanning show..... "Don't worry dear, if your grades are low, you can always do people's hair for 20 pounds an hour......" "If your grades are high, however, you can bust a gut like me working for morons for a pittance" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tam Posted March 18, 2005 Share Posted March 18, 2005 Dave21P - I may be wrong but do I detect just a hint of cynicism in your post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 18, 2005 Author Share Posted March 18, 2005 well - they seem to get paid more for being able to make all women look like bloody chavettes and darned unattractive than the rest of us do for working properly. Then picture, if you will, that they are probably on a benefit scam, breeding like bloody rabbits and bringing up similarly illiterate, ill educated children to steal all of the worldly posessions that I've spent my hard earned money buying! this country is absolutely insane. sterilise the lot of them. (well - the ones that are DIM anyway) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted March 18, 2005 Share Posted March 18, 2005 "Are you goin' any place nice on yer holidays?" Sssssscottish SsssuperSsssnot! Ssssneakypeek! whooooaaaa! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted March 18, 2005 Share Posted March 18, 2005 "You got a nite oot the night?" Sssssscottish SsssuperSsssnot! Ssssneakypeek! whooooaaaa! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 18, 2005 Author Share Posted March 18, 2005 there should be a special place at airline terminals where they have a different questions: "Are you going abroad to drink too much john smiths, demand to eat burgers and steaks and talk loudly and rudely in english to our friends overseas? Yes? here's a bus ticket to the midlands." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted March 18, 2005 Author Share Posted March 18, 2005 it's no wonder that this country is governed by idiots, they are voted in by them! No 1 rule of life - believe EVERYTHING your read in the daily mail... morons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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