not a Postman Pat Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 It seems that my little Pat-ette (aged 5) got a lollipop stuck in her hair. Her solution: Get some scissors and chop the offending bits off She is now missing a sizeable chunk of hair on the top of her head *eek* Oh, and Mrs Pat has just been to see the midwife - we think baby is due in 3 weeks, based on size the midwife reckons 1 week *eek* Pat and his not quite black and white cat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 Ross and The Doors Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boonie Hound Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 😬 😬 😬 Hope all goes well Pat I'll be ringing you for advice as you are an old hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scooby dooby doo Posted March 16, 2004 Share Posted March 16, 2004 strangely Em's kids always went utterly mental if they got dirty at all - even a drop of water on their trousers and they'd take them off rather than wear wet clothes. very strange... happy to breakfast cereal all over the floor of course... Good luck with the new shedders you've both got on the way HOOPY R706KGU Hoopylight R Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 naPP - 1 week'd be good, plenty of time to get life back to normal for Anglesey - and Mrs GTD's offer to look after one or two small naPP-ettes for you on the day if you brought them with you still stands! I took the scissors to one of the cat's tails after it got tangled around a lump of vegitation and Mrs GTD was very cross with me, , for the slightly odd looking tail he was left with! G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Much more amusing solution Geoff would be to shave all cats..... 😬 😬 😬 Also prevents any problems with allergies 😬 😬 😬 😬 dannnnnnnnneeyyyboooyy 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Pat 😬 Danny: shaving won't work as the razor will be full of cat hairs that will just provoke the same response. You need to wax the cat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Our biggest cat is well over a stone in weight - I'll pay good jelly beans to any shedder who slaps wax all over Charlie and tries to pull it off. I still shudder when I remember "Worming Tablet Sunday" *eek* G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boonie Hound Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Having seen Pat-ette at Silverstone it would be difficult to be annoyed at her. 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Immac???? 😬 😬 😬 😬 😬 😬 😬 dannnnnnnnneeyyyboooyy 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 I refer my honorable colleague to the reply I gave earlier - Charlie, Immac Yikes! Agreed on the lack of annoyingness of the young Patette at the Birkett last year! Mind you, with a Sinead O'Connor cut in 2004, who knows? 😬 G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 GTD - It works like this. 1.Put a bowl of cat food in the shower. 2.Place a tunnel made of, say, polythene garden cloches just bigger than the aforementioned cat leading up to a small opening in the shower screen (nb you need a glass screen - curtains won't do, as you will see). 3.Smear the inside of the cloches with liberal amounts of Immac (or Veet, as I believe the girly population now has to refer to it). 4.Cat will pass down the improvised tunnel in search of cat food and become smeared with depilatory gunk. 5.Wait for the regulation effective period while cat eats cat food. 6.After the depilatory gunk has had time to work its magic, turn the shower on full blast and whip the shower screen shut. 7.Cat will throw itself around hysterically in the shower but will, in due course, be rendered hairless. 8. Wait until cat is exhausted by its attempts to escape before opening door and shutting off the shower. 9. Run like £*%@, just in case. Better still, go on holiday for a few weeks. Without the cat, obviously. Easy peasy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Worryingly Meldrew.....there's been a lot of thought there 😬 😬 😬 😬 Would it work on children *eek* dannnnnnnnneeyyyboooyy 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Meldrew That is all very scarey - luckily I am out this evening (watching West Ham get beaten by Crewe, no doubt 🙆🏻 ) So I'll ask Mrs GTD to give it a go and see if your theories work! I am guessing that I'll be safe to get home in a year or two - this could be enough to get the five cats united in some kind of mutiny. I'm a bit worried about them turning on Mrs GTD tonight and forcing her through the Immac tube together! Mind you, might be preferable to watching the Hammers lose again! 😬 G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 I am guessing that I'll be safe to get home in a year or two Self-defeating, I'm afraid. their hair will have grown back by then (unless they like the hard, skinhead look and continue to maintain it themselves - then you need to be very afraid). Danny - Do this to children? Are you some sort of SICKO? Actually, you'd need to exchange the cat food for a McDonalds Happy Meal with a crappy plastic toy and change the cloches for one of those ELC play tunnels that springs into shape. Then it'd work. 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Meldrew Do you have a similar cunning plan to get cats to swallow pills ? Paul Supercheese R250 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 If the pills are small enough, you could fire them in with an air rifle while their mouths are open. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisb Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Be carefull you could end up with the picture below:- Cat lovers don't go here It is clean, honest. (After a minor mistake in google, where I should have put shaved cat not ..... And that was after the kit kat saga.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 You should see KayCees pussy.... 😳 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 *eek* G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Geoff - I'm not sure what you were thinking off!!!! 😬 Gobu ( ) broke her tail at the base and had it amputated... I'm sure KayCee can tell you about her shaved cat (resists using pussy again!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 err.. I had a girl who.............. *eek* *eek* dannnnnnnnneeyyyboooyy 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meldrew Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 That cat is wearing a facial expression remarkably like my daughter puts on when she gets the hump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Violet Elizabeth Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 Could someone a great deal hipper than me explain the term "Owned" please ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted March 17, 2004 Share Posted March 17, 2004 G 4 Geoff New Guinness colour scheme here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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