rossybee Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 Found out yesterday that Thurs 31st July is a big day for me.... Got a cancellation appointment through for my vasectomy. (was meant to be 4-6mths) Between this & my ongoing dental woes, happy times indeed... 12 Ross Very Black 6spd SuperSport Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 Refer to Perfect day thread for just how happy you'll be If ya' can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all. Thumper Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 19, 2003 Author Share Posted July 19, 2003 I'll require a wheelbarrow for 1st Aug... Ross Very Black 6spd SuperSport Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 I would have thought that in order to save money that the Scottish NHS would have used the 2 brick treatment 😳 And in fact on the 1st you'll be out buying dresses and attending gender re-assignment classes You'll have nothing sore and throbing to carry in a wheel barrow 😳 If ya' can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all. Thumper Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 19, 2003 Author Share Posted July 19, 2003 Don't need to buy a dress, got a skirt already 😬 Rumour has it the Scottish NHS use a steak mallet... Ross Very Black 6spd SuperSport Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dickie Normuss Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 I'll do it for you for a tenner, please make cheques payable to "Bobbit Enterprises" 😬 Seek forgiveness, not permission. Is it easy to rob a bank and get away with it??? THE COUNTDOWN TO BEING UNDER THE THUMB HAS STARTED!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 how long after before you can masturbate 😳 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 19, 2003 Author Share Posted July 19, 2003 I forgot to ask, but I assume once the swelling's gone it'll be OK to feed the ducks Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred Posted July 19, 2003 Share Posted July 19, 2003 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mav Posted July 20, 2003 Share Posted July 20, 2003 Oh nice 😳 Viv Wishing i had my own seven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 20, 2003 Author Share Posted July 20, 2003 it can be Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mav Posted July 20, 2003 Share Posted July 20, 2003 I'll take your word for it Viv Wishing i had my own seven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
popuplights Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 hello bike shedders, this is my first post in the shed, but after broswing a few of the threads, you seem to be a friendly bunch. As a recent entrant to the land of Jaffa, I thought it only fair that I should share my experiences with Rossybee ( and anyone else who wants a laugh ) So shall I continue?, I await your approval. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 Please feel free to enlighten us especially all the gory bits and very especially the pain & swelling bits 😳 😳 😳 😬 Supercheese R250 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KevSull Too Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 Yeah, go on, scare the s**t out of us...... *eek* *eek* 😬You laugh at me because I'm different, I laugh at you because you're all the same. 😬 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
popuplights Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 OK, thank you for your encouragement. I had the snip last November after deciding that 3 kids was enough for me. I was advised by my GP that the NHS list was quite long, and as I was taking up a post abroad, I needed a quick job, so he put me onto his mate who did it privately. The first consultation was amusing, as Rossybee has already pointed out, it is not normal for a 50 year old man to be manhandling the family jewels, but it had to be done. That first consultation set me back 90 quid, for about 10 minutes. A date was set an I pitched up to the local hospital where Harry was going to do the deed ( he seemed to have rented a room ) Had the whole family in tow. Up I went to the room, and jumped up on the couch. Dr Harry was there as well as nurse Margaret and Phillipino assistant. First off Harry starts by raking away at my bollox with Bic disposable razor, no shaving cream or anything, just dry. That had me wincing straight away. Now the painful part. He does one side at a time, first he injected my sack with anesthetic, which stung a bit. He then goes in with a thing like a crochet hook and hoiks out the tube, snips it and ties it off and stuffs it back in. A couple of stitches in the sack and the Right hand Side is done. Pain levels were pretty low. Over to the left, and he gets out the needle again. This time it REALLY hurts, prompting me to shout “ F**K ME THAT HURTS” he then goes at it with the hook again, and it is still hurting. Harry notices my wincing and offers another jab with the anesthetic. I politely decline and tell him to get on with it. !! After he has stitched up the wound ( which was only 10mm long max. ) he shows me the pieces of tube he cut out. They looked like pieces of cooked spaghetti. He apparently keeps these in a filing cabinet in his garage as proof that he did the job !! I get off the couch and pull on my tight underpants. ( note to Rossybee here, you do not want to be wearing boxer shorts on the way home ) I felt a bit squiffy, so I had a sit down in the room for 10 minutes. As I left the room and attractive young nurse looks at the schedule board outside the room and shouts “ has this vasectomy been done yet? “ I hobble past and reply “ yes, here I am “ at which she and here mates all fall about laughing. Bastards. I went back downstairs and met the family, and went to MacDonalds for a celebratory happy meal. The pain was not too bad at this stage. The next day one side of my chopper was black and blue, but the incision areas and the bollox themselves were remarkably pain free. There was the dull ache as if someone had given you a good kick in the crotch, but nothing too bad. I felt duty bound to test out the plumbing the day after the op ( solo ) and all was fine. So Rossybee, do not fret, mild discomfort for a few days afterwards and a few moments of pain during the op. A small price to pay for unlimited bareback riding as far as I’m concerned. Paul. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibster. Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 😳 😬 Supercheese R250 Edited by - paul davis on 22 Jul 2003 10:31:03 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 22, 2003 Author Share Posted July 22, 2003 I now have an extreme dislike for anyone called Paul.... Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 22, 2003 Author Share Posted July 22, 2003 ...although both your last posts had me in stitches (no pun intended ☹️) On the bright side, I am getting general anaesthetic (coward) but I think I deserve it after the sh!t I've had to put up with recently on me gob Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 22, 2003 Author Share Posted July 22, 2003 A small price to pay for unlimited bareback riding as far as I’m concerned. 😬 😬 😬 Brace yerself, Mrs B Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
not a Postman Pat Posted July 22, 2003 Share Posted July 22, 2003 😬 I am getting general anaesthetic ah, a military doctor Pat and his not quite black and white cat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asker of daft questions Posted July 23, 2003 Share Posted July 23, 2003 No, I'm just going to bash him on the head with a very blunt instrument (the hitman, in the operating theatre, with the lead pipe) I'm gonna get ya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mav Posted July 23, 2003 Share Posted July 23, 2003 😬 😳 Viv Wishing i had my own seven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minder Posted July 23, 2003 Share Posted July 23, 2003 You'll huv tae get past me first.... Get yer hands off 'im Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rossybee Posted July 23, 2003 Author Share Posted July 23, 2003 8.... Ross Very Black 6spd SuperScot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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