henry21p Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 ... in an authoritative manner and starts ordering everyone around. 1. 21's are 3 times as good as 7's 2. Dave21p is ALWAYS right, even when he's wrong 3. Daily mail readers are banned from the sheds and should be shot on sight 4. Women's magazines are only useful for firelighting. ANyone found reading one will be lobotomised as their brain has been contaminated beyond repair 5. The labour government is BANNED from the shed. As are the rest of the alternatives. Until they do as I say, they're to be ignored. 6. Stupid people are to be deported to a remote island. Said remote island is to have a wall built around it and filled with water. 7. Professionals within the motor trade are to be SHOT ON SIGHT. No questions asked. They are pathologically incapable of delivering to timescales OR budgets, have no discernable communication skills and are a pointless waste of natural resources 8. Crap is now BANNED from the television. Most of channels itv and 4 are to be shut down as they rot your brain. All soap operas are consigned to the bin, as are ANY reality TV shows and Top Gear (beacuse it has clarkson in it and he's a prat of the highest order). 9. Jeremy Vine is banned from broadcasting ever again. he's just a plonker. 10. Fat birds who think they're funny on telly are also banned 11. So is steve coogan 12. Americans now need to apply for a Visa to visit the UK, and must pass an intelligence test on arrival at our shores or they get turned back 13. It is now compulsory to stand to attention and shut the F up during the national anthem and the sheds anthem. Anyone not doing so will be put on the island of the stupid people, along with jeremy vine, that clarkson bloke and the entire ITV and channel 4 daytime TV production crew. Oh, and all the daily mail staff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted August 23, 2007 Author Share Posted August 23, 2007 oh, and criminals should be sterilised as they're obviously faulty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry21p Posted August 23, 2007 Author Share Posted August 23, 2007 p.s. Nimby is hereby banned as well. If you don't like it, and it was there before you moved in then MOVE HOUSE AWAY FROM THE PROBLEM. Any backchat will be severely dealt with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil_K Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 Dave21P for President! Best policies I've ever heard, except the first one which is clearly a sexed-up fabrication involving large amounts of spin and unfounded arguments. The rest is OK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
db Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 Are women's mags the same as girly mags? My ... Preciousss! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GTD Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 Why is Davis wearing a shift? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debert Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 Point of order Mr Chairman ... 7) Should read Unprofessionals within the motor trade ... Otherwise our cars would never get designed / built / fixed (i known this 3rd part is merely conjecture) *arrowright*Get a Mosaic Poster of YOUR car and help Nuke the Leuk here *arrowright*Pictures here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Voyant Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 Americans now need to apply for a Visa I think most of them have Visa (and Mastercard too) already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire Voyant Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 And I'm with him Professionals within the motor trade is oxymoronic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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